In a shocking move by the Lisbon municipality, next year the long-standing (well, since 1958, and excluding some years when they forgot to do it) tradition of the Saint Anthony brides, namely of marrying dirtpoor and ignorant citizens for free according to repressive Catholic hocus-pocus - will be totally LESBIONIC!!!
Mayor António Costa announced his decision in a media whirlwind, saying: "Frankly, these deluded idiots may be poor, but I for one am growing tired of these heifers being so goddamn ugly! Jesus Christ! Now girl on girl action - that's hot, right?"
When further pressed, Mayor Costa denied he would extend the invition to male couples. Appearing unusually piqued at the non-plussed journalist of football newspaper A Bola, he exited the room, screaming: "Are you calling me a faggot? Dare say that again and I'll make you my bitch till Portugal actually win the World Cup!"
Viva as (muitas) Noivas de Santo António!
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O, meu deus....can't wait to see that parade!
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